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October is here, which means it’s time to crack some spines on some eternally scary horror stories. Light some candles, brew some tea, snuggle up - there’s no better way to spend your evenings.
I recently picked up Grady Hendrix’s 2017 book Paperbacks from Hell: The Twisted History of ‘70s and ‘80s, where he “offers killer commentary and witty insight on these trashy thrillers that tried so hard to be the next Exorcist or Rosemary’s Baby.” Hendrix is an accomplished horror writer himself (I’ve checked out his IKEA-inspired thriller Horrorstör), and his observations on these novels are fantastic.
I can’t offer anything more than Hendrix does in his book, so let’s give these covers some love. Using only the options he presents in the book, I’ve chosen my favorite 10 covers, in no particular order.
Darker Than You Think by Jack Williamson (Dell Books, 1979), cover art by Rowena Morrill
This is not a ranked list, but we might be starting with my favorite. There will basically be two categories: creepy and wtf! This one definitely falls into the second category. What I like about so many of the later covers on this list is their haunting simplicity. Not this one.
Forget werewolves - this shit is about weretigers! And we’re getting the entire transformation on the cover. It’s like The Howling, but for tigers. Few artists would have the balls to put it all out there like that. Rowena Morrill, well, she had the balls.
Fevre Dream by George R. R. Martin (Pocket Books, 1983), cover art by Barron Storey
Yes, that George R.R. Martin! The guy who wrote some books you really love and will never write some books you might’ve loved. I love that it says “author of The Armageddon Rag,” because that’s the book people might’ve known! It’s easy to forget he had a writing career before A Song of Ice and Fire. It’s like how I often forget J.K. Rowling had a writing career before she dedicated her life to being a huge piece of shit all of the time.
Let’s Go Play at the Adams’ by Mendal W. Johnson (Bantam Books, 1974), cover artist unknown
This is a piece about great covers, and I do like this cover with the text on the door cracked open just enough to see the tied-up babysitter, but this one made the final cut because of Hendrix’s description in his book. Apparently, this book is really messed up, and I like the fact that the cover only really teases that. I went to buy the book on eBay and it’s being sold anywhere from $50-$100, so it looks like I will never actually know!
Slither by John Halkin (Hamlyn Publishing Group, 1980), cover artist unknown
Psycho made you afraid to take a shower, but apparently Slither rules out baths as well. If you’ve ever seen Psycho and read Slither, odds are you are a very stinky person. If you’ve also read or seen Jaws, that also rules out natural bodies of water. Maybe swimming pools? Oh wait, Night Swim!
I will not be reading this book. I don’t know what those slithering things are and I don’t want to know. And I like being clean.
Cat’s Eye by William W. Johnstone (Zebra Books, 1989), cover art by Richard Newton
Remember when I said some of the books would be defined by their WTF qualities? Case in point. I mean, seriously, what IS that thing? She’s holding it very snug, is she unaware that there’s a werekitty in her arms? Or does she love the werekitty unconditionally? I’m sorry, but if that was my child...
Not to be confused with the Stephen King anthology film Cat’s Eye, which we covered on the Drew Barrymore-a-thon!
Moon of the Wolf by Leslie H. Whitten (Ace Books, 1968), cover art by George Ziel
Obviously George Ziel’s artwork is fantastic, but my favorite thing about this cover is the pull quote. First of all, it’s from the Columbus Enquirer, which I can’t imagine would sell too many books outside of Columbus (a shocking number of covers in Hendrix’s book had quotes from the New York Times! Can you imagine them reviewing grocery store checkout line novels now?) Even better, the line “A tingler...something different!” is definitely up there with the worst pull quotes I’ve ever seen. Tingler is fine, but it’s not something good or something great or something exciting or something new...but it’s something different!
The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum (Warner Books, 1989), cover art by Lisa Falkenstern
We’ve all heard of the girl next door trope, but she’s typically an attractive young lady. You are a Sk8er Boi, she said, “C u later, boy,” that kind of thing. I do not think I would have a crush on a skeleton even if she were captain of the cheer team.
Stage Fright by Garrett Boatman (Onyx Books, 1988), cover artist unknown
A lot of the novels featured in Hendrix’s book had rock music-based stories, and therefore cool rock covers. I guess because rock and roll is the devil’s music and if you read the book backwards you’ll hear “Hail Satan” in your head or something. There were a few I could have picked - David J. Schow’s The Kill Riff gets an 11th place honorable mention - but this one was my favorite. It would be a great poster for the movie Black Roses.
Shrine by James Herbert (New English Library, 1983), cover artist unknown
I think the simplicity of this one works really well. The fiery text matches well with the shadowy figure, and, as much as I’ve liked some of these quippy one-liners, I’m glad it doesn’t say something dumb like YOU’LL BE PRAYING FOR YOUR LIFE.
You may imagine my surprise when I googled this book and saw that not only is there a film adaptation, but I’ve seen that movie! On April 11, 2021, at AMC White Marsh 16. In my Letterboxd review, I wrote, “First time I’ve ever seen subtitles in a theater and that’s ironic because this movie is lowkey ableist...Hate to be that guy but had to be that guy”
Wow, I don’t remember what I found to be so controversial!
Phantom of the Soap Opera by Judi Miller (Dell Books, 1988), cover artist unknown
I put Phantom of the Soap Opera last on this list because I think it does so many of these things well. First of all, what a great title. It should not have taken until 1988 for someone to come up with that. It’s a story about “stories,” which is just delicious. The image also features both elements of great horror paperback artwork, a creepy classic ghoul, and a beautiful naked woman. That’s pretty much all you could be looking for!
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