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Haiku Reviews: 1999 Edition

Celebrating one of the greatest years in film.

Patrick Regal
Feb 18, 2022
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Haiku Reviews: 1999 Edition

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Buena Vista

1999 is often considered the greatest year in film history.

This is a wildly explored theory:

Read Best. Movie. Year. Ever.โ€Šโ€”โ€ŠHow 1999 Blew Up the Big Screen from Brian Rafferty.

Listen to Podcast Like Itโ€™s 1999 with Phillip Iscove and Kenny Neibart.

Or browse the web for the dozens of articles with the same thesis.

So in honor of one of filmโ€™s best years, here are my 5-syllable, 7-syllable, 5-syllable thoughts on ten movies from โ€™99.

The Matrix

Warner Bros.

They inventedย an

entire cinematic

language for theย web

Office Space

20th Centuryย Fox

I have anย Office

Space puzzle right next toย me

Should I completeย it?

Eyes Wideย Shut

Warner Bros.

Watched this aloneย on

Christmas Eve because Iย had

Covid. It kicksย ass.ยน

Tarzan

Walt Disney

Everyone talks

about the music, butย the

whole movie isย dope

Magnolia

New Line

I saw this somewhere:

โ€œHow do you end this? Youย canโ€™t.โ€

Canโ€™t find where, butย true.ยฒ

Deuce Bigalow: Maleย Gigolo

Buena Vista

Canโ€™t pass the stressย test,

but itโ€™s still damn funnyย and

an extinct breedย flick

Scooby-Doo! and the Witchโ€™sย Ghost

Warner Homeย Video

Direct to tapeย Scoob

is the best Doo. We needย a

Hex Girls liveย action

The Insider

Buena Vista

Well made andย acted,

but thatโ€™s the norm for theย folks

involved in thisย flick

Election

Paramount

If you like theย show

Parks and Rec, spend some timeย with

Witherspoon asย Knope

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantomย Menace

Walt Disney

Misguided hatred?

Sure. But itโ€™s still poo. Atย least

We get Obiย show

ยนBoth the movie and the COVID kicked my ass.

ยฒIf someone can find this online, I would love to credit the original critic. Until then, I will pass along their wisdom.

For more Haiku Reviews:

Haiku Reviews #1

Haiku Reviews #2

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